New "Wellness Day" activities prepare students to lead healthy lifestyles
BY RONAHN CLARKE
The 2017 SAT will be administered to the Junior class on April 5th. During this time, freshmen, sophomores, and seniors will be kept busy - and healthy - participating in a variety of wellness-based sessions. Here are a few on offer:
Vivisection:
Have you ever wondered what one of your peers would look like turned inside out? One person who attends this section will be cut open for others to see, with the goal being to preserve them as long as possible. All other students will be able to bring home souvenirs like teeth, toes, or fingers that they can show off to their friends and family.
Safety Belts:
We all know that safety belts are important, but how important are they? Turns out not very! Students who choose to participate in this session get to ride a machine with a safety belt that comes to an abrupt stop, simulating a car accident. Survivors of their first accident can return for “expert mode,” where the challenge is to survive again with no safety belt...
The Great Bonny Eagle Fox Hunt:
Do you own a kilt? Join the BEHS athletic department in hunting foxes throughout our district’s lush woodland! Mr. Fox will be given a one hour head start to hide himself in the forest. Students are advised to beware - he is known to be dangerous. Students are allowed to bring in hounds from home.
Over-eating and You:
This session is for those who are not satisfied by first – second, third, or fourth – helpings of dessert. With the guidance of the cafeteria staff, learn about the most scientifically efficient ways to cram as much sugar into your body as possible. In lieu of providing insulin, Medical personnel will be on site with the necessary expertise and equipment to amputate limbs, should the need arise.
Nicotine: An Underappreciated Homeopathic Cure:
Smoking can be a great therapeutic habit! Learn all about this cure for stress and unease by attending a one-day only session conducted in the MPR (formerly the school’s smoking room). Cigarettes will be provided, though those wishing to smoke cigars must bring their own.
Vivisection:
Have you ever wondered what one of your peers would look like turned inside out? One person who attends this section will be cut open for others to see, with the goal being to preserve them as long as possible. All other students will be able to bring home souvenirs like teeth, toes, or fingers that they can show off to their friends and family.
Safety Belts:
We all know that safety belts are important, but how important are they? Turns out not very! Students who choose to participate in this session get to ride a machine with a safety belt that comes to an abrupt stop, simulating a car accident. Survivors of their first accident can return for “expert mode,” where the challenge is to survive again with no safety belt...
The Great Bonny Eagle Fox Hunt:
Do you own a kilt? Join the BEHS athletic department in hunting foxes throughout our district’s lush woodland! Mr. Fox will be given a one hour head start to hide himself in the forest. Students are advised to beware - he is known to be dangerous. Students are allowed to bring in hounds from home.
Over-eating and You:
This session is for those who are not satisfied by first – second, third, or fourth – helpings of dessert. With the guidance of the cafeteria staff, learn about the most scientifically efficient ways to cram as much sugar into your body as possible. In lieu of providing insulin, Medical personnel will be on site with the necessary expertise and equipment to amputate limbs, should the need arise.
Nicotine: An Underappreciated Homeopathic Cure:
Smoking can be a great therapeutic habit! Learn all about this cure for stress and unease by attending a one-day only session conducted in the MPR (formerly the school’s smoking room). Cigarettes will be provided, though those wishing to smoke cigars must bring their own.
